Keep In Touch

I'm so horribly unsuccessful at blogging. It's something that is easily forgotten, like putting out the trash on bin night, but then you remember and you think, 'Oh next week'. (And hopefully you remember). 

It's been almost 4 months since I wrote anything, but I can't think of anything new or exciting that's happened in that time.

So I'll tell you what's coming instead...

I've found this brilliant app called PHHHOTO
I'm obsessed. Btw my username is Bratnova, same for IG.

In a week I'm going to Tibet for the second time with my dad. The last time I went was two years ago, and I remember feeling so overwhelmed and nervous to go. This time around it's not like that, although I am feeling a bit pensive. I don't know why. 

This time round though I'm more prepared, in every sense. I know what to pack and I know what to expect. I know the people, even though I've forgotten a lot of names. I know the places and the smell. I know how I'll feel in certain situations. I know what to do in case of emergencies. This should all be comforting but it's not entirely so. Anyway, only time will tell how it goes. I'm expecting some pretty decent photos and video footage to edit when I get back. 

Another thing is that my lease will be ending two weeks after I get back so... Will I stay or will I go?

Find out next week on Tenzin in Real Life. 

I've been supposedly calling her Shadowcat but we decided to rename her Melisandre.

Hmmm... What else?

I got a job so now I am almost an independent woman worthy of throwing my hands up at Destiny's Child. Tafe's been on break for a while and that's been nice. I think I've currently been struggling with trying to be proactively creative.  I don't think that sentence even makes sense.

I just wanted to make a note of where I am currently on this Tuesday night. 

I'm at home, my room I call home. I love it. I love this home. I'm listening to my indie af music that is almost at the point of irritating. Speaking of indie music, my friend and I went to see the beautiful Last Dinosaurs the other night. They are so tight and ridiculously talented. Their new track Evie is brilliant. 

Evie - Last Dinosaurs 

Oh my god last episode of Game of Thrones anyone? (Anyone out there?)

And with that I guess I should go make dinner. Such an adult, I am.

xoxo Yoda 

Home is where the Stuff is

I moved over the weekend. Sometimes when I'm washing my hands in the unfamiliar bathroom sink I remind myself, "This is my new home." And like with most new things, I can't fathom it. Since I was first a teenager I have planned almost every detail regarding moving out of home. I haven't exactly followed it but I appreciate my obsessiveness from the hey days because now I have no energy to feel that excitement, but I guess, I've already felt it. 

Mayah and I packed up her little/spacious car with my wordily possessions and we set off. I still have more than half a room full of stuff back at 'home' and it saddens me to think that I own so much when I have no purpose for my belongings. I've already thrown out so much and yet there's so much more, I believe there's stuff that I've brought up that will be gone within a fortnight. 

My new room is small. Mayah and I discussed last night at 3am at Mt. Coot-tha overlooking the city that being able to move away from home, is such a goddamn privilege. Even so, I can't help but describe my room as small. My new bed's not yet in it and I worry how the room will shrink once it's in.

Tonight is my third night here and my first night by myself in my room. It's not scary but the thought is lonely. I'm drinking tea spiked with Bailey's as a nightcap so I'll sleep easy and quickly. The road outside is loud with the sounds of city life so near and the breeze (a breeze?!) makes my tightly shut venetian blinds knock clumsily. They still allow thick shafts of light in during the morning. 

In the past two nights I feel I've accomplished a fair bit. Saturday evening we left two hours later than planned, arrived and somehow still managed to unpack everything. Some friends then came over and we went out on the town to an old timey bar before heading to karaoke where we butchered our feminist anthem. Give it a week and I might do it again. Sunday night was spent at a friends house not so far away where we watched chick flicks and applied face masks to make our skin glow. Mayah and I didn't get back till 1.30am when I suggested we drive to Mt. Coot-tha (don't ask why). So we did. Apparently my idea wasn't so original and it was surprisingly busy for 2 am on a school night. The city lights are quite enchanting though. 

Despite being nervous, I'm excited about ... this. 

A corner of my new room.

Sky Tears

If you didn't already know, here in Northern NSW, it's been raining buckets. Cyclone Marcia blows up a storm in Queensland and our easterly town gets the lesser of it with only consistently raining water. The sky's tears are both bumming me out and making me feel so chill. I love it. 

Travelling up the coast isn't such a smart move at this point though because of the slippery roads yet I need to go back this weekend because of TAFE on Monday and also because I found a place to call home. It's small and unfamiliar but I already love it. I can't wait to make the room my own and christen my new queen sized bed. I've never felt more adult. 

Of course, I have many doubts and worries and am anxious about how my spendings will fare, but I don't want to think about them till Saturday. Which is tomorrow. Damn. 

I've made a list of how to enjoy the doom and gloom weather cause it's my fave.

1. Light something that has a scent to create ambience i.e. scented candles, incense, hair if that burnt smell if more your sort of thing. kidding. 

2. Create mood lighting. Dim the lights, or maybe don't use lights and opt for candles or lamps or fairy lights.

3. You need a choice beverage, in this weather generally tea or something hot and soothing is the go to but you might want a boozy baileys or even a G&T. I don't know, it's your choice bev not mine.

4. Music. Mother was playing a remix of 'Crave You' before which was not appropriate for the home in this weather. You need something slightly moody and ambient with perhaps a retro feel. Two recommended albums are In the Shower by Homeshake or Chinese Fountain by The Growlers. Maybe jazz would be preferred, Duke Ellington is recommended. 

5. The activity you choose to do while cooped in your room/house/car is entirely up to you. Read, write, cuddle, ponder, smoke ciggies and wreck your lungs (not judging), maybe skip step 4 and make your own music instead. 

So there you have it. Enjoy the rain.

2 0 1 5

No way! Welcome to the New Year. Better late than never.

Pippin excited for the New Year

Life's pretty crayy at the moment but it's a refreshing change after my 'life is dull' stage. With two weeks before my course starts, I enrolled in Tafe and I am so excited! I'll be studying Film and TV Production and I'm so glad that I'm doing something productive, creative and beneficial with my year. By the end of it I should be qualified to work in the Screen and Media Industry.

Things are getting chaotic as my friends and I struggle to find a suitable rental and I have to commute between Brisbane and my job down here. My room is getting slowly packed up and it's difficult trying to lead an organised life when my room is in total disarray.

A positive effect of packing is that I can cull old belongings that serve no purpose in my life or that I no longer want. It's a tricky process but my mum sent me a link to a site of a woman who is supposedly one of the most zen lifestyle lectures in Japan, or something. You simply ask yourself, "Does this item spark joy?" If not then out it goes. 

I recently bought this diary from Kikki.K and it truly does spark joy. Because of it's gold demeanour it's susceptible to scuffing so my beaut friend Ariel bargained it down $9. 

I'm trying to organise every aspect of my life and it's very draining having the same thoughts in my head 24/7. So it was nice to catch up with my friend today who is the other half of 'TENMOR(E) PRODUCTIONS', which isn't really happening at the moment. But it will. We hadn't had our ritual coffee for a month so it was good to finally have my long awaited caffeine intake. 

Sometimes I question whether this blog is worth building up. I'm not documenting enough of my life to feature on here, nor would it be entirely enticing. I suppose having an online journal really benefits me more than anything, and that's quite enough. 

(ps. The song below is what I'm currently vibing and so worth a listen).

So Soldier - #1 Dads

11/12ths Of The Year

Time. Never. Ceases. To. Dumbfound. Me.

Absolutely never.

How is it that it's already December? Wasn't it just August last time I checked?

2014 has been a fairly big year, not going to lie. Final year at school, graduation, became an adult, got my Learner's Permit which hasn't really been much use. I don't know, I suppose it's just been a busy year. I'm grateful, for the stress and motivation and inspiration, I just wish it would come back to me. Why is it that we take such things for granted?

Summer is reigning supreme and we're officially only two days in, when who am I kidding? It's been here since October's end. There's some sort of Christmas Beetle epidemic and I'm kind of over their buzzing lullabies. There's only 22 days left till Christmas and I've come to a realisation. If you don't have commercial television or go to the supermarket too often, it doesn't really hit you that it's 'holiday season'. It's all a marketing ploy but everyone knows that. I am looking forward to Christmas this year though because my grandparents moved into their new house and it's beyond beautiful. This will be a Christmas to remember, one to close off the year in a memorable manner. 

I must say, school is really something to be grateful for too. I don't know how I've managed to forget most of the French I learnt over the past two years but it happened. The fact that we go through 13 years of school and are supposed to retain so much content is both ridiculous and impressive. So, well done to us.

One goal for this Christmas is to make a satirical holiday card. Like this one but more personal. Perhaps the family in shorts and singlets holding stubbies and wearing thongs, zinc casually striped across the face? I don't know, I think its sounds fair dinkum.

Slow Progress But Progress None The Less

Progress. It's happening, but oh so slowly. 

I'm working on a new mini doco, 'Lost In Transit'.

Normally I'd be pumped and motivated and just go at final cut pro like mad until I had a rough version which I'd slightly edit before proclaiming it done. I haven't done more than 50 seconds in three days. I'm thinking I might have to source more interview material and stream line the questions. It was just a test run but I do like the answers, they just don't all meld together. I've credited it as 'Tenmore Productions' but it's more like I'm the editor/director and we're both the subjects and interviewers. I wouldn't expect this to be a joint effort anyway but I like labelling it that way, makes me feel professional.

The questions were varied. I started off on gender stereotypes and emasculation before we talked about motivation and teenage hood. I'd like to go deeper regarding both topics but for now I think I'll just focus on what we know best as we are experiencing it now. It will allow us to question our current actions and mull over this age and time, will it be the time of our lives?

Hopefully it will be one of many.

I Count Time As It Slips Through My Fingertips

It's a quiet night at home. We've just had dinner and I'm tossing up going to bed by 9 which I hated as a child and don't quite mind now, reading 'On The Road' which I've been meaning to read for the past two years or watching an episode of a tv show. I know, it all sounds riveting but then again, it's only a Thursday.

It seems to me that I'm counting time in weeks and I marvel at how on Monday I will have been a legitimate graduate and still haven't accomplished anything in the likes of a job or goal or hobby or anything within 2 weeks. This below is what I did in my flatline boredom. I've shared it on four social media sites just to prove how uncool I am, but I'm not afraid to say that I'm 'secretly' proud of it. 

The views that I've gathered so far from my friends is that we all need hobbies. Ok, what do I like?

Chocolate, tea, reading, being lazy, writing poetry and general creative writing, film making, film watching, people watching, staring at things and out of windows, photography, planning my future, reminiscing on the past. I'm really good at that one.

Lately my parents keep telling me that I think too much, I need to be present and not get lost says my father while my mother says I need to act in the present for a future to be possible. It's hard I tell you.

My bedroom floor is a heap of lists and stationery, things to do, short term/long term goals, moving tips and tricks. My friend and I have decided that what we need is a drastic change of scenery and new smoggy air. We're moving to the city so good luck to us. We're unemployed and broke, the perfect recipe for a cheap sitcom about this new generation. We could be the new 'GIRLS' or 'Two Broke Girls', the gist is the same in both really. 

Anyhow, my other friend and I will hopefully be starting up our film production soon and start making a mini doco which should be fun. A topic, audience, and group to research is yet to be decided. The name is a combination of both our names, Tenmor(e) Productions. I like the 'e' but we're not sure if that'll be a thing. 

Lately I've been making an effort to go outside and actually leave my room. Every time I go by the river I see armies, swarms, invasions, of blue jellyfish. I'm enamoured by them, both entranced by their awkward and graceful floating, and then disgusted by them when they beach themselves and die.

...And so after much deliberation I have decided to watch tv. Because that takes less energy than sleeping apparently, but sleep is next on the list and I can't wait. Even though I don't do much with my day, I'm tireder than ever. I've been trying to find a job to support me financially as well as save me from wasting my days. Being rejected numerous times in one day is pretty exhausting. 

I'm feeling a bit empty like this cup.

I'm also realising that I'm coming across as quite boring and dull because of my meaningless drivel about nothing. All I can say is that it's nice knowing that no one is really reading this and therefore no one can be bored, and if you are then thanks because you've spent you're time getting to know my angsty not so sociable side. 

Next time I promise something productive will have happened.